Image by Atelier Teee via Flickr Not any more. The truth is coming out. Nasty Astrology by Richard MacDonald is eye opening to say the least. He tells us what no other astrologer has even attempted to share. His writing is seasoned with a sense of humor all his own. I'm left wondering, what could Richard MacDonald's sign be. Next on our list is the Taurus. They like others to think of them as refined and experts when it comes to food and drink. This is just a cover; they are in reality a glutton and a drunk. They care nothing for culture, it's all a matter of getting quantity rather than quality, although they do make a good job of fooling most people. They are greedy both for oral satisfaction and material wealth. No one can accumulate quite like them. They can also do a nice line in fake environmental concern - they really couldn't give a damn just so long as they own it all. They have too many close relatives.
Don't cross these babies. They have horns and spikes and all sorts of weapons. They probably sleep with shotguns under the bed. They are quick to lose their temper. They like to throw tantrums to get their own way and will carry on doing so long after childhood has left them behind. If they can't get their own way they'll attack you. They feel threatened a lot - so they tend to barricade themselves in behind security devices. They think everyone is out to rob them.
They often come across as cheerful and slightly drunk. They are never as causal and laid back as they appear. Think instead of a shrewd operator, canny business person, think acting and pretence. They like you to think of them as silly, but beneath that bluff exterior beats a heart of solid dollar signs.
They like to use foul language and are quite blunt. They don't like to be rushed and they don't like to take risks. They have too many books. They are rich and hide their stuff away - it's always under the bed by the way. Taureans go to great lengths to avoid falling in love. They would much rather be eating or drinking or hoarding money. Being in love cost money. Once they do fall in love they will suffocate you with attention and affection. They will stifle you, lock you away and smother you with tacky gifts. You will not be allowed out of their site. They think having lots of children will keep them safe from being dumped.
When it comes to Taurus and sex. Think bovine. Think big. Think ungainly. Think all over in a second. Their sexual preferences tend towards the natural, the basic, the lusty and the rude. They don't like kinky sex. They like quick, no-nonsense sex, to be got over with as quickly as possible.They don't like to change partners too often, as breaking in a new lover takes too much time, too much money, too much effort. They are so lazy that they would stick with someone pretty well no matter what, rather than have to go looking for a new lover.
In business they are honest. Unflinching loyalty is their strong point. Their ideal occupation would be Estate Agent. They think they belong in the country but the suburbs is the place for them. Working for themselves is not for them. They like a wage packet too much. They're sticklers for details, far too bogged down in petty rules and bureaucracy. They don't have a lot of initiative. They also steal pens.
Well, what do you think? Does this sound like anybody you know? Gemini, you're next.
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